Can there be such a thing as too many spring breaks? If this is a malady, I have it. If it is a blessing, I am looking for a way to appreciate it. This week is spring break for Gwinnett County schools, which typically falls the first full week of April. It is relevant to … Continue reading Too many spring breaks
If you’re a middle child, you know how precious a commodity attention can be. Frequently caught in that unenviable space between the accomplishments of the eldest and the parlor tricks of the youngest, the middle must somehow carve out for themselves a niche that affords them an identity and recognition. Carla and I have put … Continue reading A monumental trip
As the New South’s most beloved humorist, I am highly sought after as a member of group chats. My contributions are hilarious and always result in a “HaHa” symbol from the other members of the group. That’s how I know I am hilarious. Why else would someone respond with the “HaHa” symbol? Ok, so maybe … Continue reading Group texts are the new social media
As I write this week’s post, a 20-pound black and white purebred miniature parti poodle warms my lap. Archie seems to be right at home but has indicated I need more surface area to provide a stable napping surface. He recently came into our home, upending our routines, stretching our patience and growing our capacity … Continue reading The incredible journey of Archibald Wallace
Snowmeggedon. Snowpocalypse. Winter Storm Van Helsing. Whatever you call it, snow has been falling across the South this year in quantities not seen in my neck of the woods in a decade. We had two rounds of it with winter storms striking Atlanta Jan. 10 and Jan. 21 bringing with it that wonderful mix of … Continue reading Snow without kids just isn’t as fun
Dear Faithful Readers and Adoring Fans (all three of you), Because of the overwhelming demand for more insider gossip from the first family of New South Essays, I am once again releasing the official Wallace family Christmas letter through this wildly popular platform. Last year’s clickbait edition generated so much traffic that it’s clear our … Continue reading The Official Wallace Family Christmas Letter 2024
The element of surprise contributes mightily to the joy and wonder of Christmas. My celebration this year has been largely devoid of this crucial component thanks to technology. That’s right, efficient and convenient online tools have robbed me of another of life’s simple pleasures. I have very inefficiently and inconveniently labored to counteract these tools … Continue reading Not-so-secret Santa
Every year when the holidays roll around I face an internal struggle between capturing the magic of the past and experiencing something fresh. No two Christmases have been exactly alike, but there has been enough of a thematic throughline that my boys have expectations that we do specific activities in a certain order: Thanksgiving, breakfast … Continue reading This year will be different
Thanksgiving week is upon us, and as we prepare our feasts and plan our shopping, the inevitable flood of nostalgia descends, flavoring our post-meal conversations with reminiscence. Always eager to indulge my inclination toward nostalgia, I offer these brief stories of Thanksgivings past to prompt you to remember and share your Thanksgiving memories. Our spread … Continue reading Memorable Thanksgivings
This just in: hurricane season is not over. According to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) hurricane season for the Atlantic Ocean basin lasts from June 1 to November 30. But just when I begin to believe we’ve almost made it through, Southern Living, of all places, robbed me this week of the opportunity … Continue reading Worrycanes
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